Divorce is never easy — but how it unfolds depends a lot on how both people approach the process. Mediation can be an empowering, cost-effective path forward, but it only works if both parties come to the table with good faith.
Let’s look at two fictional couples — Suzi & Bob, and Jack & Jill. These stories highlight what makes mediation successful, and what makes it stall.
Suzi & Bob: Stuck in “Principle”
Suzi wanted to divorce her high-conflict husband, Bob. Bob agreed to mediation mostly because he didn’t want to pay attorney fees and thought lawyers were “dumb.” He also believed he could get away with bullying tactics in the mediation room.
At first, things moved forward. But soon it became clear that Bob wasn’t negotiating in good faith. He wanted to “stand on principle” rather than face facts about money, parenting schedules, or the law. Sessions dragged on. Suzi felt like she was going in circles.
Ultimately, they did reach a parenting plan, but it was difficult. In some cases, couples like Suzi and Bob end up having to lawyer up and go to court. Not because mediation is “broken” — but because mediation only works when both people are willing to problem-solve, not just posture.
Takeaway: If one spouse is entrenched in control, blame, or “winning,” mediation may not be the right fit.
Jack & Jill: A Model of Cooperation
Jack and Jill had been married 14 years, with two young kids, two homes, and a small business. They didn’t want to fight — they wanted clarity, fairness, and a new foundation for co-parenting.
In mediation, they:
- Gathered financial data together.
- Consulted with professionals (a CDFA®, divorce real estate expert, and mortgage specialist) to evaluate their options.
- Took a realistic approach: “What works best for our kids, and what’s financially sustainable for each of us?”
As a result, they created a parenting plan both felt good about and a financial/property agreement they trusted. The process even gave them new communication tools they could carry forward post-divorce.
Takeaway: When both spouses come ready to be fair, mediation is not just faster and less expensive than court — it’s empowering.
So, Which Story Sounds More Like Yours?
If you’re more like Jack & Jill — practical, ready to problem-solve, and invested in fairness — mediation may be the best decision you make.
👉 Try our Divorce Cost Calculator to see how much you could save compared to litigation.
👉 Or, schedule a free consultation to find out if mediation is right for you.
Curious what your divorce might cost?
👉 If you’re ready for clarity, book a free 15-minute call with Liz.